Tag Archives: life skills

PARENTS: After Your Child Has Submitted Their Last College Application

A friend of mine told me about a website and Facebook page called Grown and Flown.

One of the first Grown and Flown posts I read is about what to say to your child after they have finished their last College application. After they hit send on their last College application, my kids (and to be honest, my) overwhelming emotion was relief. A lot of work and stress has taken place to get to this point, it’s nice to check this activity off the list. I’m not sure what my kids felt next, but I definitely felt frustration. After all that work leading to this moment that we couldn’t wait to arrive, we now have to wait, wonder and ponder. Wait to hear back, wonder whether they will be accepted and ponder where they will attend College.

Pixabay UndecidedIf your child applies Early Decision and gets accepted or applies Early Action and/or Rolling Admission and gets accepted and chooses to not wait to hear back from other Colleges, that wait could be as little as a month, Otherwise, that wait is likely a minimum of 3 months, but sometimes as long as 5 months, or even longer if they applied long before the application deadline. During those months, you may be wondering if they will be attending the nearby State College or that small liberal arts College is Northern Maine. Will they need sunblock and swimsuits or a warm parka? Is this going to cost $7,000 or $70,000 a year?

As the writer in the post above notes, it seems like things should be said at that point, but I had no idea what to say, other than “Good job”. The writer provides some great advice.

On a related note, for those of you who feel too busy to read parenting books now your child is no longer a toddler, the internet is a great resource for advice. Being a thoughtful parent is work, so if you feel too overwhelmed to be thoughtful, do an internet search on an issue and let others who have been thoughtful offer you some advice. Being a thoughtful parent of a teenager is one of the best ways to spend your time. Teenage years are really tough years, especially these days. Don’t think your parenting should be limited to setting curfews and asking if they did their homework. Another reason for being a thoughtful parent? Your teenager will soon be leaving the nest. You want them to think of that nest as a warm, comfortable, loving place, so they want to come back on occasion.

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College Budgeting – Tuition, Room, Board & Living Expenses

Does money motivate you?

Money discussions between parents and students can be uncomfortable, but must not be avoided

Before your family discusses your College budgeting for tuition, room, board & living expenses, read What Can Parents Teach Their Kids About Money, regarding the related topic of learning to be financially literate. My family’s budget decisions are somewhere between those families who pay for all of their student’s education, including all of their living expense and those families who either choose not to pay or can’t afford to pay for any of their student’s education and living expenses. I would say our budget plan is towards the more generous side, because we were in the position to help our kids avoid financial debt as the means to pay for College. We made that goal a a high priority. Fortunately, because of our strong financial position and careful planning, we were able to make that happen.

My guess is that some of you will read our family’s budget plan and think, “LUCKY!” and others will think “No way would I let my parents make me pay for so much or live with so little.” To each his own…

I am choosing to share our budgeting plan, because before we came up with this plan, I felt overwhelmed with how to make these decisions. But I felt uncomfortable asking other families how they handle College budgeting, as it can be considered a very private/sensitive topic. On that note, I apologize if you feel this post is too preachy or judgmental. Please comment on this post if you would like to share how you set your College budget.

College Budgeting – Tuition, Room, Board & Living Expenses

We had accepted the fact that our choice to prioritize academic rigor, extracurricular activities, family time and enrichment opportunities did not allow our daughters a lot of options for working while in High School. But we felt strongly they needed to have some skin in the game, when it came to paying for their College expenses. Fortunately, their academic excellence netted some merit money to help take some of the pain out of paying for College. While this might not be the most straightforward approach, we made decisions on who was paying for what in College based partly on how much money they had saved. Our daughters do not qualify for financial aid, which makes it more difficult to get an on-campus job, which also factored into our budget planning.

I was amazed at how many family and friends sent a generous check when my daughter sent out High School graduation announcements. As the money came rolling in, the first thing I said to my daughter was, “You think you are rich right now, but you’re not. This money is going towards College expenses.” Kill joy? Maybe, but I wanted to be clear, before she made plans on how to blow her wad! We also made a point of using separate savings accounts for better budget tracking, so she wasn’t going way over budget on her discretionary monthly living expenses, using money that was to be earmarked for books and school supplies.

Laptop Image

Most people are more careful when they are spending their own money

Our daughter wanted a high-end laptop, and again we felt she must have skin in the game, so we told her she had to pay for half the laptop, and we would pay for the other half. We made a point of telling her this early in her Senior year, so she could make wise choices about how she spent any money she earned, and to motivate her to find work during the summer before she started College. Part of the reason for our decision was because a student is more realistic about what they MUST have in a computer (or a car, or whatever expensive item they are buying), if they have to pay for all or some of that cost. We had multiple computers available in the house for our daughters to use, but we did not give them their own laptop while they were in High School. Again, everyone makes their own priorities. Our decision to deny them their own personal computer was partly to avoid the cost of that luxury and fuel high expectations, and partly because we felt a teenager with their own computer doesn’t have a lot of reasons to leave their bedroom. We heard some grief about this, but I can tell you it made getting her laptop for College much more exciting for our oldest daughter, not to mention the fact that she got to start College with a new computer, not one she had been using since Freshman year of High School.

This is how we worked out our daughter’s College budget:

Tuition/Room & Board
No full-time summer work meant there was no way she could save anywhere enough to make a dent in these costs. Since they were also fixed expenses (and not subject to her spending whims), we chose to pay for all of her tuition, room and board. We were fortunately in the position to do so, not only because we had a good income, but also because we started saving for College literally the day she was born. If you are paying for College with no help from your parents and through student loans, it’s a great idea to use those loans solely for those things you can’t afford to pay for with any money you have saved and any income you earn while attending College. The smaller the loans, the smaller the payment after you graduate, and the sooner you will pay off those loans.

Books/School Supplies
Pixabay BooksBecause of generous High School graduation gift money, I knew my daughter had enough money to pay for a year’s worth of books and school supplies. Do an internet search to check the average cost of College books/school supplies, to help you budget this expense. I didn’t feel bad about this practical use of graduation gift money, because I think most people who gave her money wanted her to be at least somewhat practical with that money. I believe Graduation gifts are not only an expression of “Good Job!”, but also a recognition that a College student has some big expenses coming.

Spending Money
I asked my daughter to spend a week calculating all of her living expenditures, from toiletries to an occasional meal out, so she could come up with an estimate on how much she would need to pay for her living expenses on a monthly basis. She was diligent and frugal with her estimate, which I promptly nearly doubled, knowing she was being overly optimistic. Luckily, that College savings account that started with a quarter a week when she was in first grade (see What Can Parents Teach Their Kids About Money to understand what I mean) was now just enough to cover that monthly living expenses budget we had established, for one academic year. The message was, this is your money, you decide how you spend it, but you only have enough money in your account to accommodate $X in monthly expenditures. If you overspend one month, figure out how to underspend the next month. Even though the first and last months of College are only partial months, I suggested she allow the full monthly budget for those months, because they would be more expensive months, between moving into and out of her dorm.

Pixabay Piggy Bank

Careful spending means more money available for future expenses

My daughter promptly downloaded an app on her phone to help her track her expenses, and has been doing a great job of making sure she has enough for practical expenses like shampoo and snacks, but also to treat herself, whether it’s to go out to eat with her friends when they are celebrating a birthday or buying herself ‘a little something’, just for fun. We also felt it was important that she has access to the entire year’s living expenses savings account, so she could practice budgeting and fiscal constraint. Knock on wood, we haven’t received any “I’m running short on money” calls yet.

She also understands that if she is careful with that money, any money left over at the end of the academic year will be used for the following year, which means there is that much less money she has to earn/save for the next year. I also told her that if she went to College and discovered her expenses were much higher than her budget, we would reconsider her monthly budget, after some thorough discussion!

Exceptional Expenses
I made a list of things I considered important that she might not. For example, outside her monthly living expenses budget, I pay for her prescription medicine, laundry expenses and sunblock. I didn’t want her to not regularly wash her clothes and sheets because she didn’t want to spend money out of her monthly budget, and I didn’t want her skimping on sunblock or her medication, due to the cost. Occasionally my daughter will have an unexpected cost arise, and then we negotiate who should pay for it. Need some gear for your sport? Take that out of your books/school supplies savings account. Find you need a warmer pair of gloves? Maybe I’ll pay for that expense.

We also established that we would pay for flights home, because she goes to College out of the area. We miss her!

Pixabay VW VanHere’s an item that is highly variable to the situation, as well as subject to you/your child’s opinion and financial situation. Do you send your kid off to College with a car? If your kid is closer than a plane ride away, you have to figure out how hard it will be for them to get home without a car. If they live on campus and aren’t going to be working off campus, you may decide a car is unnecessary. Even a car that is fully paid for is expensive, between insurance, gas, maintenance and parking. We decided that a Freshman without a car is more likely to take advantage of on-campus activities and otherwise be engaged. We also think experiencing an occasional inconvenience builds character. At times our daughter finds no car to be highly inconvenient and at those times, she’s not too happy with us. We will reassess the need for a car each academic year, as internships and other off-campus activities become prevalent. An important part of the car discussion is agreeing on who will pay for the related expenses. Again, a student with skin in the game may have different expectations than one who does not have to pay for the expense of having a car on campus. You will have to figure out your priorities.

Saving for Future Years
Our message to our daughter is that we hope she can get a good enough job over the summer to re-fund her books/supplies account and her monthly living expenses account for the following academic year. If she can maintain academic excellence in addition to her College sport, she has the option of taking a campus job during the school year to start saving for the next year.

This approach to funding future College years reinforces saving for the future, which is a great life skill. Knowing that this money is her money, and that the more she spends the more she needs to earn/save later for the following year, has made her very conscientious about her expenses. For example, she did a great job of finding deals when she bought text books, knowing that any money left in her books/school supplies account will go towards next year’s books/school supplies.

Budgeting Helps Make Students Financially Aware
During a visit to campus, I was pleased to hear my daughter talking meal-plans with a fellow College student. She had calculated how much she could spend on a daily basis to keep within the budget of her meal plan, and was working hard to stay within that budget. They were discussing another student, who had already used up their large meal plan for the semester only half way through the semester. My daughter immediately pointed out, “Do you see how much he’s spending on drinks at each meal? He spends more than half of my daily meal plan allotment on drinks, no wonder he is already over budget.” Yeah, baby, she is certainly more financially literate than some of her friends. Our hard work is paying off.

Pixabay Pie

College is hard! Do something nice for a College student you know.

Sweetening the Pie
Whether it’s care packages with snacks, a Starbucks gift card and/or a $20 bill, or a campus visit that includes a small shopping spree, it’s nice to be able to do something extra for your child on occasion. I remember the rare unexpected check from my parents when I was in College and how excited it made me! It’s important to remember that College is hard and to respect the pressure College students experience. If you can’t afford to sweeten the pie, maybe a grandparent, aunt or uncle can do a little something now and then to cheer up a poor, hardworking College student.

Change in Plans
Lots of things could happen to disrupt our College budget plan. What if my daughter gets an amazing unpaid internship opportunity over the summer or moves off campus? Then we will have to re-assess who pays for what. Even if that happens, we have established a realistic budget. Otherwise, your kid may be off spending money indiscriminately and coming back to you ask for more money. If you haven’t set a budget and established expectations, its hard to decide how to handle this situation. Remember that while you want to be reasonable, it’s OK to say no to your kid. My daughter tells me she sees lots of students who clearly pay no attention to the amount of money they spend. I’m OK with her being envious, because I believe I am helping her learn some great life skills.

Another big caveat is that we will re-consider this entire plan if my daughter does not apply herself in College!

Preparing Your Child for Financial Independence
For families who are in the financial position to do lots of nice things for their kids (cars, electronics, and other luxuries), I think it’s important to ask yourself whether you are really helping your child. I didn’t grow up with lots of things, so as I started my post-College career, I believe I took more pleasure in the things I was able to buy myself. If you buy your kids only the best things, and a lot of them, don’t you think post parent-funded life might be greatly disappointing? You bought them a new Lexus, and when they go to replace it, it will probably hurt if they are struggling to afford a used Yugo. Or maybe there will be no such disappointment, because your kids will expect you to fill the gap between what they can afford and what they believe they must have to be happy for the rest of their lives. Maybe you consider that the circle of life, or you hope that if you give them the taste of the good life, they will be motivated to work hard so they can afford the good life on their own. Either way, that’s your decision.

We had our kids relatively late in life. We remind our kids that they were too young to remember when spare money was more of a scarcity in our lives, and that our comfortable life now is a reflection of years of hard work, careful budgeting and an emphasis on saving. Not everyone can be that fortunate, but we all try.

Pixabay StressfulRemember that you are modeling financial literacy and success for your children and try hard to set a good example. Make sure you are making thoughtful money decisions and having these uncomfortable financial conversations with your student! By the way, something you might consider discussing now is Graduate School. As much as we understand a graduate degree can be helpful for long-term success, we told our daughters that grad school is their bill.

Pixabay Sharing Information

Share Your Experience

If you would like to suggest another way to help College Students budget their money, please share a comment.

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What Parents Can Teach Their Kids About Money – If Your Parents Didn’t Teach You About Money, Read On…

The numerous links at the bottom of this post are just a few of the MANY articles and advice regarding what parents can teach their kids about money. Even if you have diligently taught your kids about money, you can find some good advice in these and many other articles. If you haven’t been teaching your kids about money, maybe these articles will get you started. If your parents haven’t taught you about money, please read on.

Financial Literacy
Champlain College’s Center for Financial Literacy, using national data, has graded all 50 states and the District of Columbia (D.C.) on their efforts to produce financially literate high school graduates. Amazingly, 26 states received grades of C, D or F; 29% had grades of D or F.

The first thing I find interesting about this study is that we are grading whether High Schools are doing a good job of teaching financial literacy. I believe that financial literacy is one of the most important life skills, so supplementing the financial awareness lessons learned at home in the classroom is a great idea. But I worry that High Schools aren’t always supplementing, but actually teaching basic financial literacy skills that aren’t being adequately addressed in student’s homes.

Pixabay Grade of CThe second thing I find interesting is that a lot of States are failing at this task. This confirms my strong belief that financial awareness must be fully taught at home. Even a 6 year old can be taught something about saving money. Here are a few examples of how my husband and I have taught financial literacy at home:

  1. One of the first lessons we taught our kids is that there are people in life who have money, and their are people in life who spend money like they have money. We stressed that often the people with the most money are the least likely to spend it on frivolous things. I remember one of my daughters coming home from elementary school saying she was pretty sure we were one of the poorer families at her school. That was most definitely not the case, so I was curious as to how she made that assumption. She said, “They have nice cars, go on big trips and they have lots of cool gear like Xboxes.” I understand that because we are in the enviable position of having enough disposable income, we get to pick and choose how we treat our kids to the child-luxuries of life (as in, the things they consider important). I also completely relate to families who can’t afford a lot of things wanting to treat family members to small luxuries, to make up for not being able to do all the things families with more money can choose to do. I grew up in a large family without a lot of money to spare and understand the dynamic.
  2. We regularly talked to our kids about ways we save money on expenditures, whether it’s buying an item in bulk to get it for a better price, finding coupons, waiting for a sale, or just plain waiting. Do I need a new pair of tennis shoes, a handbag or whatever, or can it wait? That doesn’t mean we didn’t splurge, but we make a conscious decision to splurge ON OCCASION. For example, we live in a small town without a lot of shopping. That means that sometimes finding the right item when we were in a larger town meant we didn’t have the option of waiting for the sale, we just needed to get the item when we found it. When we did not making smart budget-wise decisions, we try to discuss our reasoning to our kids.
  3. Pixabay Teddy Bear in Sweater

    How do you negotiate purchasing the luxuries of life?

    Whenever my kids asked me whether we could buy something, whether it was a box of cereal at the grocery store, or a new sweater at the mall, my first question was always, “How much does it cost?”. It amazed me how long it took them to figure out they should know the answer to that question before they asked. It’s not a matter of whether we can afford that particular item (fortunately, they were often asking for something that didn’t cost a lot). By asking the about the price, I am asking whether they have considered whether it is a good value; for example is there a similar item for less cost, or maybe a better quality item that will last longer for a similar price? As they grew older, they were much better at saying “Can I get this dress? It’s on sale for $xx, which is a lot less than the dresses I saw at the other store. I think it would be great for the wedding we are going to next week.” The answer was more likely to be yes, because they demonstrated that they were being thoughtful about this expenditure.

  4. One way we save money on a daily basis is rarely eating out. Yes, it’s time consuming to plan, purchase, prepare and clean up after each meal, but it’s also MUCH less expensive and MUCH healthier.
  5. Pixabay Calculator

    People are usually more careful with their own money

    Saving for something special was another important life skill we tried to teach our kids. We did buy them each a smart phone and paid for their data and cell plans. But we chose to buy the plan that allowed 2 GB per phone – if they went over that 2GB of data allowance, they had to pay for the overage. If they cracked the screen, they had to decide whether to pay to replace the screen or save up for a replacement phone.

    One of our daughters wanted an iPad, which we definitely considered a luxury item. She saved most of her allowance for over 6 months, worked in our yard, being paid “a penny a weed”. Saving enough for an iPad was still a struggle, so we gave her cash as a birthday gift, giving a little more than we normally would, indicating that we were trying to match her efforts to help her attain her goal. When she had enough for that Ipad, she was much more thrilled with her purchase than if we had just bought her an iPad for her birthday. We hope that she applies that same financial constraint and work ethic when she buys her first car, rather than taking out a loan that she pays back over 5 years.

  6. We all set our own financial priorities, and things we consider essential others might think is an unnecessary luxury. My advice is to make sure you are being thoughtful, and consider how your actions demonstrate your values much more distinctly than what you tell your kids about money.

Pixabay Piggy BankWhy Allowances Are a Good Idea
After demonstrating to our kids through our own actions what we do to save money, we needed them to start setting their own budgets and learning how to live within those budgets. That’s why allowances make sense. I had no allowance (and was given no spending money) when I was a kid, and thought it would be smart to do the same for my kids. Then I read an article about how the best way for your kids to learn how to manage their money is to start at a young age. The only way that I could think of to make that work was to give them an allowance.

Here’s how we started: beginning in 1st grade, they received a weekly allowance of 75 cents. BUT, a quarter was put in a box they decorated for College Savings, a quarter was put in a box they decorated for Long Term Savings, and a quarter was put in their piggy bank, for spending money. It didn’t take them long to realize that 25 cents didn’t buy much, so they were forced to save their piggy bank money for several weeks or even months before they could even think of using it to buy something. That might seem cruel, but the reality is that we were already buying everything for them – clothes, food and non-essentials. Each year on their birthday, their allowance was increased, but a third of the allowance went into each savings category. Once they had enough money, we deposited these funds into a bank account. Unforuntately, with very low interest rates, they didn’t get to see much growth in their savings, beyond what they were adding each week. Eventually, they had enough money saved they could choose to purchase a couple of stocks, if they wished.

Their allowance made a big jump when they started High School, because we told them that while we still bought the food they ate, the clothes they wear, their shampoo and other essentials, they now had to buy their own make-up, movie tickets, optional meals out (going out for ice cream with friends, for example) and other discretionary spending. We realized that as they gained more independence, going on outings with friends without us, there would be more occasions where they would have to make decisions regarding how they spent their money. We wanted those discretionary purchases to come from their own discretionary fund, rather than asking us to buy those non-essentials for them.

They quickly learned that between the ticket and concessions, going to a movie theatre was an expensive date night. Their compromise was to either bring in a box of candy to share they had bought for much less at the grocery store, or even better, to suggest to their date that they watch a movie at home via Netflix or video streaming. Sure, that meant I was providing the food, but I really preferred for them to be at our house, so I knew what they were up to. I was willing to take on the cost/effort of providing the food for them and their friends, which was my financial priority. Movie tickets also became a well-appreciate stocking stuffer. I find it interesting when families who I consider to have limited financial means regularly go out for movies. Again, maybe this was how they chose to treat their kids, or maybe movies are an important luxury for them, or possibly, they aren’t really thinking about the cost of that evening out.

Learning the Value of Money Through Work
Nothing teaches a teenager the value of money quicker than having a job.
Busting their butt for hours and making minimum wage is a very quick lesson in finances. It is also a means to teach them that if they want to live off of more than the minimum wage, they needed to acquire more knowledge and skills, which means continuing their education beyond High School. If your kids are earning money through work, make sure that all of their wages don’t go to luxuries.

Does money motivate you?

How do teenagers learn the value of money?

I had always planned on having my kids work when they were in High School, like I did. But between their school sports and other extracurriculars as well as a very rigorous academic workload, working during the school year, other than occasional home/pet/baby sitting, wasn’t an option. Likewise, the summers have not all resulted in regular jobs. We live in a small town with a fairly large University. The competition between College and High School students for summer jobs is fierce, which meant our decision to use summer time to be involved in enrichment and/or academic camps, travel and time with extended family, required flexibility. Employers did not need to accommodate our daughters’ summer schedule, as there was a long line of students behind them willing to work without any time constraints. So unless we have been able finagle an internship or other flexible job, my kids haven’t spent a ton of time working outside the house. I think in the long run, this will be a good decision, as their busy schedule has required them to learn strong time-management skills and their life experiences traveling, etc. make a well-rounded person. But in the short term, I wish they had spent more time working. I felt we had to be more creative and thoughtful in teaching our kids financial literacy because of our choices for how our family used the summer holidays.

How you choose to handle your student working will be customized to your situation. My only suggestion would be to avoid the extremes – don’t let your kids work so many hours their grades and social life (yes, that matters too) suffer, nor let them lay around after school all day with very little to do. We all know that teenagers with lots of free time is a recipe for disaster. I think most teenagers would admit that not having much to do isn’t really a good thing.

Pixabay Playmobile Figures TalkingIt’s Never Too Late
I realize that most of you reading this website don’t have a toddler at home. But regardless of the age of your child when you begin to actively teach financial literacy, it’s never too late to have a big impact on your child’s ability to manage money. Even if this has not been a big topic of discussion in your home, as you are preparing to send your child off to College, you can have some great conversations regarding money management. I think it’s important to not have those conversations be about anxiety. If you are fearful about money, try to not convey that anxiety, express it more as a concern, and make the discussion constructive. There is a lot of stress on a new College student’s shoulders, dumping more stress on them as they arrive at College does not help them.

I found it difficult to ask other parents of College-aged students how they have arranged the College Budget – this can be a sensitive topic. I decided to break the ice here by sharing our College budget plan. If you are comfortable doing so, please post a comment sharing your family’s College budget plan.

Articles with Advice on Teaching Your Kids About Money:






http://payoffpilot.com/financial-tips-advice-students/ (Thanks to the Girl Scouts Troop who alerted me to this website!)




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*** Elligiblecollegestudent.com is a division of Complete Systems, LLC ***


Tracking Your Applications

Tracking Your Applications is important, because while Colleges will likely contact you if part of your application is missing, you never know when there will be a hard deadline that you will miss due to an incomplete application. Remember that with every interaction, you are being evaluated and that you always want to make a good impression.

Appearing to not have your act together, as demonstrated by an incomplete application, is not a good idea. Furthermore, you may have met the minimum applications requirements, but planned to add an optional piece, such as a flowing Letter of Recommendation from your Music Teacher or Coach, beyond the standard LORs. That LOR is filed by the Music Teacher or Coach directly to the Common Application, so unless you are tracking your application closely, you may not realize that they had not gotten around to filing that LOR.

A large part of stress is worry. Do I know what needs to be done? What are the deadlines? Did I get it done? Do I need to follow-up? These are the types of questions that keep us awake at night. Organizing, documenting and tracking are skills that enable busy people to fall asleep at night – they have an organized a process which determines what needs to be done when, and they document and follow that process. These are important life skills, that help you beyond this one, important process. Below is a sample spreadsheet for tracking the Application Process, by College.

Pixabay SpreadsheetApplication Checklist

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Admissions Interview Preparation

Pixabay Job Interview

Initial Impressions During an Interview are Important

You are a rising Senior or Senior in High School. You have scheduled an interview with an Admissions Officer or Alumni. Even if they tell you that the Interview is not highly considered, a very weak or very strong impression can still have a major impact on your chances of being admitted. Some Colleges highly consider your interview. Interviews are your opportunity to share your narrative, explaining apparent weaknesses in your resume and highlight your strengths. It’s time to make an impression, which means it’s time to prepare!

If you want to know a College’s general policy regarding the importance of interviews, go to Go to Collegedata.com and type in <College name> in the enter College name box. Choose the Admission tab and scroll down to Selection of Students. Many factors that can impact admission are listed, including Interview. These variables are categorized as either Very ImportantImportantConsidered or Not Considered.

College Interview Advice Resources:

My general advice:

  1. Check out the Admissions webpage, their marketing materials and and any interactions you have had with the College. What personality comes out in these materials? It’s a quality they are likely actively trying to exude and encourage. Quirky, offbeat? Probably don’t want to sit through the interview stone-faced and without demonstrating your personality (although even if their tone is not quirky and offbeat, please don’t sit through the interview stone-faced!). Aggressive, intense? Better demonstrate your confidence and high goals.
  2. Even if you have read and retained a lot of information about the College, your memory may let you down at a time of stress, such as during your interview. To help you retain what you learned about a College, and to have notes to refer to during the interview if your memory lets you down,
    Pixabay Spreadsheet

    College Summary Pages

    I suggest creating College Summary Pages. These pages include basic College information you should know for your Admissions Interview, as well as your notes on why you love this College and questions you would like to ask about the College. Whoever is interviewing you will be impressed by your organized, thoughtful approach to the interview when you ask relevant questions that can’t be easily answered on the College’s website.

How Important is Interview Prep?

Sometimes you feel too busy to do all this prep. Here’s my why you prep story:

My daughter had an interview with a Connector, set up with the aid of another Connector (see the bottom of my Word of Mouth post if you don’t know what a Connector is). The Connector had the ability to impact my daughter’s visibility at a College she loved. In fact, during the meeting with the Connector, he set up a meeting for her at that College (for the NEXT MORNING, because he was so well connected and respected). Here’s the deal about this Connector – he was INTENSE! High energy, kept company with high-profile CEO’s, non-stop varied interests and activities. This was a successful and powerful person, doing our friend who connected us a favor by sharing some of his time with us to give advice and assistance.


Review Sample Interview Questions and Rehearse Your Answers

On the way to the meeting, I suggested to my daughter that she go through some sample interview questions and advice, which she did half-heartedly. During the meeting, this Connector asked her several direct, probing questions – “What did you learn from your experience traveling abroad?” “If you love this school, why aren’t you considering that school?”, etc. etc. At first, my daughter did just an OK job of answering these questions, and this Connector immediately called her on it – “That’s not a good answer!”. I could tell my daughter was intimidated, but she started thinking better on her feet. BOOM! He quickly made her understand something I had been trying to teach her, but the impact was much greater with this high-profile Connector calling it like it is. After the interview, we got in the car and she immediately pulled up some sample interview questions and advice, and spent 2 hours reading and rehearsing answers in her mind, so she could be better prepared for next morning’s campus meeting that this Connector had set up for her.

This experience also led to a great discussion about a new concern for that College. “Are all the graduates that intense?”, she wondered. “Do I want to go to school with a lot of students with that personality?” “Will I be able to hold my own?” We agreed that not all graduates from this College were likely to be as intense as this Connector, but she was going to spend time while on campus scrutinizing the students’ personalities.

Remember that someone who is interviewing you is taking time out of their day to spend time with you – respect them for doing that, and make the interview worth their while! Last bit of advice: you may be running around on campus attending tours, information sessions, meeting with Admissions Officers and maybe a few other people. Track your appointments, so that you make sure you are where you are supposed to be at the right time, but also to help you remember what you did and with whom on each campus.

Pixabay Sharing Information

Share Your Experience

Do you have other advice for Admissions Interviews? Please leave a Comment.

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*** Elligiblecollegestudent.com is a division of Complete Systems, LLC ***


Word of Mouth

Word of Mouth breeds knowledge (and knowledge is POWER).

You Never Know When You Will Learn Something New, Sometimes From an Unexpected Source

You Never Know When You Will Learn Something New, Sometimes From an Unexpected Source

I know, I know, you get what you pay for. But word-of-mouth is invaluable in both preparing for College and The College Search, in the same way that this website is valuable to students and parents, because you are getting advice from a parent who has recently helped their child in The College Search and who understands the need for specific, organized, pertinent information about The Search. Effective word-of-mouth, by my definition, means that people are sharing information they think is valuable to each other. Word-of-mouth information can be inaccurate or incomplete, but it often provides a bigger picture, and a different perspective.

Do you need examples?

1. My kid wants to take a class not offered at her school (Advanced French, for example), and is debating whether to take that class at another High School, a Community College or on-line. She asks her counselor, who suggests she take the class on-line, because its hard to line up her class schedule at her High School with when that class is offered at another High School or Community College.  She is proactive, and asks a few friends who have taken off-campus courses for advice. One of them warns her that their school allows only 2 classes be taken on-line. My kid wanted to take Health and Creative Writing through on-line courses, and realizes that if she takes Advanced French on-line, that will preclude her plans for Health and Creative Writing. She can now make a more informed decision, some of that information coming from word-of-mouth, which is more complete information than she discovered merely by talking to her counselor.

2. A Senior in High School is debating whether to apply to a “reach” school, thinking it’s unlikely he will be accepted. He mentions this school to a friend, who happens to be friends with a College Junior (Sherry) attending that College. This friend tells him that Sherry struggled with her grades when she attended their same High School. He mentions this news to a teacher, who knows Sherry. The teacher offers to connect the students over Skype. During their discussion, Sherry admits that she did not have a great cumulative GPA due to some missteps early in her High School years, which makes the boy hopeful, as his GPA is also not stellar. She said that based on conversations with the school and her classmates after she attended the College, she understood more about what got her “in”: a) the College valued that she got consistently better grades starting her Junior year, b) she had spectacular test scores, and c) the school emphasizes sports, and she was a star varsity volleyball player. At this point, he feels less hopeful, as he has not been successful in raising his grades his Junior and Senior years, his test scores are average and he doesn’t play a sport. Can he find more information that might might make him think he can get in? Yes, but he knows a lot more after the conversation with Sherry than if he had only been told that there’s a kid from their high school who wasn’t a great student that got in. That doesn’t mean he can’t apply, but now he knows his chances of acceptance are not high. Maybe that conversation gets him thinking about how Sherry’s talents helped her gain acceptance, and that he should look for another desirable “reach” school that emphasizes music, because he was a finalist in the State Competition, playing the oboe. Knowledge is power!

The key to word-of-mouth is you have to be talking to someone who has experienced the same issue or know someone who has, and that this person became very knowledgeable about that issue. That is why a College Counselor can be invaluable, because they know the intimate details of many students’ experiences, and therefore will be more likely to provide relevant information. But even their experiences are limited, so you should still be trying to procure word-of-mouth information, censoring it for inaccuracies. Seek knowledge through many resources, but don’t discount the value of word-of-mouth.

Pixabay Playmobile Figures Talking

Great things can come from talking to others about your College Search

When I am with a group of parents with High-School aged children, it is invariable that a discussion about Colleges results. These can be GREAT discussions, because someone is sharing a story or insight, and if there are others in the group with similar experiences, they can elaborate or disagree, based on their knowledge. That story leads to more questions, and I am leaving that gathering with new things to think about.


Word-of-Mouth Breeds Success

Another reason to get in the habit of promoting these discussions? Most people agree that success in life often comes from who you know. But you need to FIGURE OUT who you know. Do you know where your friends went to College? Their current employer and position, as well as previous employer and positions? Where they used to live? Their sports and favorite past-times? Knowing who you know means you can take advantage of their experiences when the need arises.

If you are a connectoror know a connector, good things result.

Connecting Can Be Fulfilling

Connecting Can Be Fulfilling

connector knows about their friends, co-workers, etc. and connects people. If their cousin wants to be a Financial Advisor, they connect her with their son’s best friend’s father, who is a Financial Advisor. When their babysitter is moving to Oregon for a position at Nike, they connect him to their co-worker, who used to live in Oregon and has friends who work at Nike.

Word-of-Mouth can be awesome!

© Complete Systems, LLC dba Elligiblecollegestudent.com, All Rights Reserved
*** Elligiblecollegestudent.com is a division of Complete Systems, LLC ***